You make my willy go big!
MASTERWIND up (Shit farts, no idea!)
I’ve looked everywhere for the perfect birthday card that says something about you! (not for boys)
Who’s the daddy?
MASTERWIND up (Puss, no idea!)
OFFICIAL WARNING - time for a bit of pillow talk, have yourself a ...
OFFICIAL WARNING - I think I farted inside this birthday card?
MASTERWIND up (Fuck, no idea!)
It’s my birthday today!
To do… sit on my face!
This great super fantastic card comes with a poem I made up all by myself!
A perfect birthday card must say something about you - cuntface!
Love is… like a banana, peel back the skin and receive your daily subscriber!
Love is… licking my lips nips ’n tits!
Love is… finding Mr right size!
Love is… like the weather, it gets me wet inside!
Love is… in my genes!
Love is… like chocolate, you suck it slowly and let it melt in the mouth for a sticky finish!
Love is… sharing gourmet Italian pizza, expensive red wine etc etc.
Love is… at the bottom of the garden, seek it out and ravish my tidy bush!
Love is… always looking the dog’s bollocks!
Love is… driving me up the wall!
Love is… bigger than both of us, smaller than some of us, but it fits nicely with you!
This is about as rude as it gets...
Your birthday… it’s a piece of cake!
A fanny thing just happened!
Not for girls… bottom burp championships!
Wanted - (a) Dog (b) Vibrator (c) Man
Bought the card, bought the pressie!
Man + woman = love!
Love is… all around, you just can’t see it yet!
Love is… keeping your legs two metres apart, hovering your face, and watching your hands!
Love is… finding the bestest card ever with a nice picture of a moon on?
Happy birthday weirdo!
Introducing the nobblies
Love is… dirty minds coming together - fancy it up the bum?
Bun in the oven?
Wine body spirit!
Queen for a day?